Beyond words.

I am an optimist. That might not be the first thing people think of when they picture me, but I know deep down in the dark dank depths of my little soul, I am. I want so badly to think that people are truly good at heart. (I sound like Anne Frank or something....) And every once in a while, this thought clouds my better judgment and I get slammed to the ground by my naiveté. Each time, I get up, brush myself off, and honestly, am amazed at what just hit me. Why am I always surprised? Because I want people to be good. I want to be liked. I want the world to be a happy place, but I know that's not to be.

Evil is all around us, and sometimes good people get caught up in it. And then, some people are just mean. I truly believe there are people out there that live and breathe to cause problems in others' lives. They feed off of it and are encouraged by seeing others suffer. And don't let them fool you - they know EXACTLY what they are doing. I've been burned enough to know it doesn't have to have red horns, a tail, and a pitchfork to be a bad thing.

I am trying so hard to be a good and positive person. I have an accountability partner now. We work together to make sure that we are constantly encouraging and lifting up those around us. You know...if you don't have anything good to say, don't say it??? We are really trying to rid our lives of the negative, and work toward the positive. I know we have a long way to go...but it's so difficult when people are constantly beating you down. It's infinitely more difficult to get over it when you are hurt by someone you thought you could trust.

Oh well...I know it's a vicious cycle. I will get over it in time and be caught back up in it again before I know it. How's that for optimism? :/